"Do you remember your first fap?"
This thread went away before I could finish typing my reply!
Remaking it because I think it's an interesting topic.
Pasting my excessively long answer below. I'm curious if any others out there started as young as I had.
>my excessively long answer
I started masturbating when I was really young; around five or so. It started when I was looking at my 3D View Master (remember those) of ET and one of the images was Elliot injured or something, bareback, with suction cup electrodes on his chest. I interpreted them as being on his nipples and something about that filled me with the desire to do it too! So I made something looking like the electrodes (back then I had no idea what they were, just what they looked like) and placed them onto my nipples and I experienced one of my first erections. Again, I didn't know what that was either but it so uncomfortable inside my little jockey shorts that I started poking at it.
I remember pretty consistently playing with it for a long time and then completely forgetting until I was perhaps nine or ten years old. By this point, girls started to appeal. In my Faraway Tree illustrated book, there was this vision to heaven to my nine-year-old self named 'Silky the Fairy' (pic related). I resumed poking and prodding at myself pretty regularly.
I remember my first orgasm! I remember because I thought I'd hurt myself! After some prolonged poking at myself I suddenly felt that unexpected 'pulsing' kind of feeling! I thought I was like bleeding out through my penis! I covered the whole thing up with my hands and slammed my eyes shut in fear! By the time it had stopped and checked myself and noticed there was no blood. That scared the heck out of me so there was no more touching taking place for quite awhile, but the curiousity was just too strong and I was back at it again sometime later. I was careful to not 'overdo' it though for fear of that feeling again!
I think my older sister figured out what I was up to because somewhere around that time I had gotten 'The Talk'. She told me what an orgasm was and that "it might feel weird but one day you might enjoy it" and that encouraged me to keep 'experimenting'.
>my first erections
Back at that age I didn't know what they were. They felt so weird though and were so uncomfortable in my jockey shorts (which I almost exclusively wore until I was like six or seven).
I showed my mom with great concern. I remember she was sewing at the time and was wearing her glasses.
I remember saying the word "prooking" because it somehow expressed how it felt.
I told her, "My birdy prooking me..." In hindsight, she obviously had no clue what "prooking" meant (seeing as I'd made the word up at the moment of saying the phrase) so she started inspecting me. I definitely remember how nice it felt because part of her inspection involved her looking under my (as I know now) foreskin. There was maybe some white fluff or white thread under there—who knows how it got there—and her removal of it felt soo... interesting!
So part of my aforementioned 'poking and prodding' at my... ahem... 'birdy' then became trying to stuff fluff and thread under my skin and removing it, attempting to re-create whatever-it-was my mom had done. I never worked though. It never felt as good at that moment. I remember the reflection of her bright sewing light in her glasses while she inspected. Goodness.
PS: No, these days I don't feel any sort of sexual attraction toward my mother! I'm quite convinced this part of being an especially curious five-year-old.
>sexual attraction
These days the bulk of my sexual attraction is toward my friend Shauna.
I regret to say that I have posted her all over Any Forums during the start of the pandemic. That wasn't a good time for me mentally.
I paid money to thebarchive website to have her pics deleted.
I still masturbate to her constantly though. I really need to stop. Especially because once-or-twice, impulsivity hit me such that I messaged her at night during my... let's say... 'sessions'! Thank f*cking goodness Instagram added that 'Unsend Message' feature!
Man, I hope she never saw any of them. I hope I was lucky and she wasn't awake during those times.
These days when I'm having 'sexual relations' with a woman who has made herself my partner, sometimes the only way I can get myself interested enough for sex is to imagine Shauna.
I don't know if that's healthy. Maybe that's how it's meant to be? Fantasy? Imagining a mistress while with a wife? I don't know.
Man, porn is so much easier than all this!
>Shauna
I admitted to Shauna to having an armpit fetish. 'Skinny pits'! Yup, I'm the skinny pits guy.
It's all because of Shauna's arms though. She used to do rowing in highschool and had just amazingly sexy arms and shoulders. Sometimes when she raised her arms, I could see a little bit of stubble of her shaved armpit hair. It gets me so excited!
Well, to be fair I think I always had a bit of a weakness of armpits, but Shauna's just really got me.
I'm actually getting very slightly turned on now thinking about her and a particular photo on her socials with her arms raised.
I was seven and I was just looking at (not fapping to) porn here and there.
I got curious, so I got one of those human sized teddy bears, cut a hole in its vagina, and put a beaker (i think) inside of it, and I tried to replicate the porn.
That shit fucking hurt, don't try it.
>very slightly turned on now thinking about her
I'm such a creeper. Shauna is a fully eleven years younger than me!
I met her when she was only fourteen!
I was going out with one of her best friends at the time (who was legal age!) but almost immediately fell for Shauna instead when I finally met them all in person.
hmph. That ex was maybe the Love of my Life though. She really was. But she was a difficult person. Borderline personality, I think. Poor thing drove herself crazy even more than she drove me! But it was a 'toxic' (to use that odious Millennial term) situation and after four years I had to pull the plug on it.
I'm not naturally someone who likes hurting people though so I had a _very_ difficult time pulling that plug!
I had to sort of fill myself with fantasy scenarios of breaking up with my ex in order to be with Shauna as a way of encouraging myself to follow through with the breakup.
It worked.
I felt rotten as heck and was heavily dysthymic for literal years afterward... but it worked.
So all of this to say that this concept called 'Shauna' has become something of a symbol to my mind. The poor girl is up on a pedestal she has no clue about!
But, yeah, it's not healthy. And Shauna and I really are very different people. I'm much older and wiser now and can appreciate how bored we would have been with each other had we really connected.
She's still sexy as heck to think about—gorgeous girl—but it would have collapsed very quickly.
Well, I guess I have my fantasies then. hmph.
eep!
user, a glass beaker?!
You are so very lucky you hadn't injured yourself!
How did you have access to porn at such a young age?
Do you remember your first orgasm? Was it scary to you too?
>How did you have access to porn at such a young age?
My brother used to draw that shit all the time
>Do you remember your first orgasm? Was it scary to you too?
My first orgasm was with the beaker. I remember it was unsatisfying.
>My first orgasm was with the beaker. I remember it was unsatisfying.
But you knew what it was?!
I guess because of seeing the porn?
Was it only the sexy drawings your brother made, or did you see actual porn videos?
I remember seeing Heero Yuy in those shorts and just needing to fap
Nah, it was just the demented fucking furry porn he used to draw.
That was some weird shit and I loved it (publicly) for some reason.
>Heero Yuy
Oh! Okay!
I didn't know about the character until i just looked it up.
You're gay, user? Do you remember how old you were at the time?
>That was some weird shit and I loved it (publicly) for some reason.
Maybe the art style was cool to you?
I don't know, I'm not a furry but some of those images are still quite cool or even sexy to look at.
I am --
I'm pretty sure I was 12 at that time
>I was 12 at that time
And you knew _how_ to fap? Maybe classmates in school talked about it? Or how did you figure it out?
No joking.....me and my best friend were sucking each others cock WAY before either one of us every stated masturbating. I think I was 14 the first time I ever jacked off to completion but I started sucking off some of my friends when I was only 8 years old. By the time I was 11 I had sucked off 7 different boys and I had 1 friend who I sucked off literally every day from the ages of 10 to 17.
The first time I ever masturbated, I was in the park with some friends, none of them were ones that I had sucked off before and the didn't know that I was a cocksucker. We were sitting in the park just shooting shit on the swings when one of my friends started talking about masturbating and circle jerks. Even though I loved sucking dick, this sounded gay to me.
But that night as I was laying in bed and thought about the talk about masturbating and tried it for myself. It felt better and better as I jacked off so I just kept going and then finally came for the first time from just jacking off.
From that day on, I started masturbating every day. In my teen years and 20's I was jacking off 3-4 times a day even when I was having sex with my best friend and with girls.
In my 30's I had gotten married so I would only jack off twice a day. And in my 40's and now 50's, I jack off once a day but sometimes twice. I have sex with my wife about once a week. Which is 9 times out of 10, a blowjob from my wife.
that part's a little vague but I do remember talking about it with my friends, we'd argue about what jerking off meant and someone actually explained what it meant and I think it was clear we were all curious.
Also I can't remember if this happened before or after, but a kid jerked off in front of me to some softcore hbo porn and tried to get me to do it to but I was too scared. So it's possible that's how I knew, it was definitely around the same time
>Even though I loved sucking dick, this sounded gay to me.
That's so ironic!
>No joking
Yup, I believe you!
It's not surprising to me you said you're an older gentleman because I find things were a bit more free and honest back in the day.
There was a strange kind of purity that comes from just honest curiousity and experimentation!
I'm so disturbed at the loss of imagination these younger folks seem to be experiencing and I won't be surprised if it's the cause of so many 'flame outs' Millennial-aged men have with women these days.
Look, there's even now this 'deep fake' technology robbing us even of the opportunity to imagine and fantasise for ourselves to our favourite celebrity or what-have-you.
It's not good.
>Which is 9 times out of 10, a blowjob from my wife.
My partner and I almost exclusively do oral sex. I usually get her off first either with very specific use of fingers and / or my tongue, and she gives absolutely amazing oral. I don't know if you had any of those skills growing up, but she is amazing!
>friends
>a kid jerked off in front of me
ah, Yeah! That makes a lot of sense then!
Actually, as you mentioned it, I remember I'd also learnt how to masturbate 'correctly' at secondary school / high school.
As mentioned up there, I used to sort of randomly touch and poke myself until something got me to climax. At school, the stuff boys talk, I slowly figured out that the 'correct' way to masturbate was making a circle with the hand and stroking the penis up and down.
I remember it felt so vulgar to me the first time I did it that way! But that was a massive turn on.
These days, I've done it that way so much throughout my Life that it's become a bit boring. Started revisiting other ways with my partner. Little circles around the underside, where the foreskin connects to the penis, that's heavenly.
yeah I'm sure I did that toying around stuff quite a bit too, toying with myself and whatnot. obviously when I actually started to climax my hand never left my dick lol. Used to get road rash on my dick from beating off to much but I think that probably happened to many boys. Pretty much just got off to anime / game characters, and thoughts of one of my friends i liked
>Used to get road rash on my dick
I know what you mean!
I'd given myself phimosis once (from overdoing it). The irony that the cure was to masturbate more was... quite interesting.
>I don't know if you had any of those skills growing up, but she is amazing!
I learned how to deep throat when I was just 16 years old. Just after I had started drinking with my friends.
One thing we would do while drinking was down beers and to do it you had to "open your throat" and just let the beer pour down it.
While sucking my friends cock one day I kept gagging every time I'd try and get his whole cock into my mouth so I thought about downing a beer and I "opened my throat" the same way and I was able to deep throat his penis.
Between the ages of about 35 and 48 I did not get to suck very many cocks since I was always with my wife, but we split up for a bit so I started going back to parks to suck off complete strangers. Something I had started doing when I was about 22, when I found out about bathhouses and public cruising spots.
Well when I got back into sucking cock again a couple years ago, I tried to deep throat the cocks I was sucking but just could not do it any more. Maybe with some more practice I would have re-learned it but my wife is back with me again so getting out to suck cock is pretty hard to do now.