How do former rightoid trannies feel about themselves

Any former right wing trannies feel weird about themselves now that they're transitioning? I would hate the person I am now when I was 16, I would have thought that I was a tranny freak who cut off their own balls. Now I see and look at myself and think that I am a woman. I bottom, I wear women's clothes, I've voice trained, I have c cup boobs, and my balls are gone. I my fiancee loves who I am but I still can't help but feel weird about myself. I sometimes feel like I could have been right before but I probably couldn't go back now. Anyone else have thoughts and feelings like this about themselves?

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What makes you think we're former?

I always knew I was different and wanted to transition but hated myself a lot, but also hated a lot of the toxic feminism I grew up with, so while I knew I was just a liberal I mostly stuck with more edgy right wing types online.

now that I transitioned, I'm much more left now, but still have a lot of the same criticisms of some left stuff so I'm not that troubled by my "change"

I mean I guess the question also applies to right wing trannies. I'm no longer right wing tho.

I on occasion will be troubled by it because I feel like I probably couldn't go back now. I've been turned into a man hating feminist because of how men act around women lol. I put up with my fiance's occasional misogyny because I love him though.

>Lenin
kike

I am Jewish so... I was an explicitly fascist Zionist when I was right wing ._.

I know how shitty men can be and knew since I was a child from how all the other boys treated me. but feminists treated me like shit too for my sex so I can't ever forgive them for that

I am pretty lucky because I pass and women just accept me in their circles now so I have learned first hand what women talk like and what they mean when they say they hate men at least.

>that image
Imagine the state of the antifa pedo-tranny that identifies with it.

yes I pass too and girlmode etc but that's not really the sort of comments I meant, I meant the sorts of things I had to hear growing up as a boy. Like teachers splitting classes up by sex and telling me how stupid and immature you boys are while praising the girls while spouting off statistics about how much better girls are at things. It felt like a nightmare to me.
and then at puberty being dictated and lectured about what my sexual interests apparently were. Sure my conservative parents did that too, constantly pressuring me to get a girlfriend, and awful boys asking how I'd want to have sex with the girls in class and making horny comments about them, but feminists did the exact same thing, presuming things about me, just using it to bash me instead or lecture me

I understand that I guess I guess I was more willing to accept feminist ideas. Do you have any weird regrets from transitioning? I regret not ever having PIV sex before I got an orchi and my dick stopped working basically permanently. I only bottom now for that reason. I kinda regret it because I can never go back

>pretends to be a leftist
>does uncle Adolph's bidding by sterilizing itself.

I am going to get srs and am very happy with my transition and have zero regrets. I've seen too many horror stories of repbros getting kids because they were too retarded with wanting to have piv sex too.
I'm only attracted to guys anyways. I didn't even realize growing up that I was supposed to use my dick for anything. I've had zero penetrative fantasies and never wanted sex with a woman

And I've read actual feminist books and theories and I do like quite a bit of it but they still have a lot of blind spots and stupid behavior and I can't really blame my younger dumber self for feeling scorned

I don't want to breed anyway tbhon. My brothers have kids

I've been thinking of getting srs too. I think I would feel complete that way. I just regret never having that experience because I am attracted to women and apparently it feels really good. I've accepted it but eh. I'm not a man anyways and I guess it would be weird

>Like teachers splitting classes up by sex and telling me how stupid and immature you boys are while praising the girls while spouting off statistics about how much better girls are at things.
>and then at puberty being dictated and lectured about what my sexual interests apparently were. Sure my conservative parents did that too, constantly pressuring me to get a girlfriend, and awful boys asking how I'd want to have sex with the girls in class and making horny comments about them, but feminists did the exact same thing, presuming things about me, just using it to bash me instead or lecture me
Holy shit are you me?
Back in the past I had tons of horrible dysphoria related just to the idea of being perceived in some essential way as male or female and wanted to believe I had a feminine essence, and the mean terf stuff online would really get to me emotionally. Now I don't really care about that as much and am just fine being like "I am what I am." But those things growing up played a big part of that. I remember thinking all the time in elementary and middle school stuff like "it's not like I chose to be a boy or anything..."
Like, I'd even call myself a feminist today generally, but growing up I felt like I was being treated like a sheep in wolves clothing from the start. Like, other boys would act to me in mean ways, only for the teachers to then pull us aside and lecture us about how girls are pure smart angels and us boys act rowdy and do mean things to girls, even though many times the boys were doing those exact things to me...
It's like at some point in early childhood we were all mostly treated the same, then all of a sudden one day lots of adults, even teachers, would suddenly start treating me like I had some kinda secret internal nefarious nature or something. I would come for help with something and they'd look at me suspiciously because I was a boy.

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I remember back in my boy LARPing days (was on blockers but not allowed to be out, think 13-14) I could never be accepted into male groups because it'd always turn into objectifying women meanwhile they'd either think I'm a liar or gay for not being into that then kick me out as a result.

Kinda funny really. I always tell my cis girl friends that boys really are just as gross as they think behind closed doors because it's usually true... But since everyone assumes that of you already I'd imagine they feel like they have to live up to that in a way so it's kinda like a self fulfilling prophecy, I just never could manage to even pretend to be like that...

At least you can be yourself now!

Yes yes. Those were exactly my feelings. And why I still feel pretty hurt even today. And it's not like they'll ever apologize for it or understand it at all, just say "Well it was for the greater good to help curb toxic masculinity" even though the actual bad guys don't gaf anyways and never listen, or "Well if you were ACTUALLY trans you wouldn't have let comments about being a boy hurt you!" lol. That's why I don't care about the whole "should feminism care about transwomen" debate because...what about when I was a little boy? nothing would have changed since I wasn't a 'woman' yet anyways. And society would have still spread those hurtful ideas. I was getting bullied by the boys (and girls!) for not being enough of a boy, and then bullied by feminism for just being a boy anyways? How was this fair? I just fucking hated everyone.

So much of it was just the flipside of the same coin I got from the conservative angle. Sometimes I just wanted to scream out that I'm A Girl or I'm Gay (in a strict catholic school no less) just to stop that horrible feeling of being judged for my sex or assuming what my sexuality was just because of how I was born, just to make it stop

inb4 "oh those teachers and adults and media and stuff werent REAL feminists" lol

blockers at 13...I transitioned much later...I grew up in the 90s-00s so certain cultural ideas were probably different then from when you grew up.

And I did manage to find some groups of boys (some IRL but mostly online) who realized I wasn't like them and wouldn't pressure me into that kind of talk. But they were also lonely outcasts like me, into things like games and anime, so edgy jokes and politics eventually won over. So that's sort of how I ended up on places like Any Forums and eventually got more reactionary friends rather than lefty ones.

actually I found out one of the popular jock kids from HS actually was closeted gay and now has a bf etc as an adult. So I wonder if he felt the same frustrations I did.

>be gay
>read Lenin
The joke literally wrote itself.

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Because I matured with age and I don't really think being a tranny is incompatible with right wing ideas, especially futuristic ones.

Don't hate me, but I think I'm around the same age as you. Born in 1994. I just got incredibly lucky because my Mom was buying me Cyproterone after she caught me trying to castrate myself...

Though, I had no friends and stopped going to school of any kind at like 15 because the bullying was so bad, so there's that...

What ideas would those be? Can you explain