Sex

sex

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these are the famous torpedo tits

sauce?

>they have to sag like mine

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I believe it's spartacus

this is why i love collars now thanks spartacus

>almost done downloading last episode of Spartacus
>mom says she doesn’t want me watching that show
>says it’s not accurate
>says Rome was good and the slaves were violent animals
>I tell her that words fall from mouth like shit from ass
>I set upon her with a gladius I made from toilet paper rolls and dragon dildos
>dad runs upstairs to see what the fuss is about
>tell him his whore wife stands fucking Roman
>he stands Roman as well
>my two cats (named Ashur and Andy after the honoured dead) set upon him like drunks to wine
>we fight them off and hold the top of the stairs

I have barricaded the upper floor and liberated the neighbor’s wireless after they cut m connection but we run low on boxed wine and hot pockets. I stand with choice; go out the window and set upon the Roman shits who loiter in the house like fleas on dog, or lead my cats in bold attempt to raid the neighbor’s fridge (and fuck their daughters with my raging cock). Tell me brothers, what is the best course of action that leads to swift death of Roman scum and quick return to watch episode 10 of based Spartacus?

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I'm something of an actress myself

god I wish I had sex

By Jupiter's Cock, you have but one course of action, friend. Perform heinous deeds upon said scum, pause to fondle your catamite on the way to penetrating your whore and raise a cup of wine to Hera's teats to ensure good fortune before your epic binge. And know this: the Gods of Any Forums nod sagely in quiet acknowledgement as your celebrate your baser nature.

Plastic tits don't look good, and they look even worse outside of a dress

it's good tbqh

I know, I had it before

I'm 35 and I have never even seen a tit irl.

they feel amazing though. your brain and dick thinks they're real. perma hard on

I wasted my entire prime not fucking.

>brother in law drags you to a Roman tomb
>Giuseppe the 5th wakes up and attacks
>fall into time portal running away
>get sent to ancient Rome
>fuck hot slave bitches

you need to m8

How long has it been for you my brother?

I doubt anyone here has had a dry spell that lasted longer than mine currently is.

Pussy is easy to get, big dog.

>Ass fucking a hot slave in front of your hot wife
This scene made me diamonds